So, I found an aspect of bike riding I don't like: Critical Mass. That is not true I think the idea of Critical Mass is awesome and important. I was proud to be a part of Critical Mass. My problem lies with Lawrence's Critical Mass.
I should rewind for a second and explain Critical Mass. Critical Mass is a movement in over 300 cities world wide to raise awareness of bicyclists. It was started in 1992 in San Francisco and is leaderless. The only plans given is to meet at a specific place at a specific time (6:00 p.m. Wescoe Beach for Lawrence, usually 5:30 p.m. in other cities) on the last Friday of every month and to travel around the city as a group. In cities like San Francisco they have at least 1,000 riders--so it really does raise awareness.
I believe the whole idea of Critical Mass is very important but there are a few aspects of it that I do not like:
For example in bigger cities (which I just learned about this and am sure if we had more people Lawrence would attempted it) "corking" is practiced. This is when cyclists who are not riding stand in the middle of intersections to block traffic so the cyclists can ride through red lights, though they do leave one side of the intersection alone. They either hold up their bicycles (known in Chicago as the Chicago Hold Up!) or lay down next to their bicycles (to represent the bicyclists that have been hit by cars) to block the traffic.
In Lawrence, none of us wore helmets. The only two bikes that had working brakes were my bike and my roommates bike, we were also the only two bikes to not be fixies. We did not stop at any stop signs and the boys would weave in out of both sides of the streets randomly. All of these signs seem to say "hey fuck you cars, we are more important than you"--when really the movement is about rasing awareness, not about being an asshole.
That being said we only had one guy yell at us to get on the sidewalk. We had countless people honking, waving, clapping, cheering and some guy (who I kid you not was drinking a budweiser at a stoplight) rolled his window down so we could jam out to his music. This was not necessary as Charlie, the guy who stayed behind everyone--which I thought was really cool of him, had a backpack with speakers and was blasting the MJ in honor of MJ.
That being said, I will probably do Critical Mass again (although the next time I will definitly be drinking way more water throughout the day before hand) because I have almost been hit numerous times for stopping at a stop sign, crossing an intersection or just biking down the street.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Sunday, June 21, 2009
This blog post will come in several parts and is being written as I am currently still really sick and way out of it, so excuse grammar, spelling and word choice mistakes.
Part I Catching Up
I haven't been feeling decent emotionally or mentally lately. On Friday night into Saturday morning I worked from 11 pm to 9 am. At about 5 am I got violently ill but stuck it out for the rest of the shift. I went up and went to bed and woke up around 2:30--still violently ill.
Part II Driving
I ended up making a horrible decision to drive to my mom's house because in my head I thought I'll be better off there. The drive home takes about 35 to 40 minutes and I fell asleep twice. I also took my exit going 80, not realizing what I was doing till I had to slam on the brakes to prevent flying off the edge. Slamming on my brakes caused my car to almost flip and roll. It would have instantly killed me because my windows were open and I wasn't wearing a seat belt. This is the third time this has happened to me. The first time I was in my red KIA and exited for Lawrence and there was ice on the road and I should have slid off but slammed on my breaks and surprisingly didn't. The second time I was with Allison, and this is the only time I feel horrible about it. I mean if I kill myself because of my driving, I'm okay with that but if I kill one of my friends would only hope I would end up dead as well because there is no way I could tell someone's parents "I was driving and stupidly sped and didn't pay attention. Sorry I killed your daughter my best friend." Anywho, the second time I was driving around back roads in North Shawnee, near Lake Quivera. In high school I knew these roads like the back of my hand and I knew when I could speed, when the 90 degree turn was and where the dead ends were. I ended up going from 65 to 0 in a matter of 4 seconds and really honestly I have no explanation for how we didn't slam face first into grassy hill where the road made a T.
Part III Shutting Out
I've been completely shutting out various people in my life right now, simply because it is what I need to do. It is what I do when I don't know what else to do or how else to solve the problem, and it is what has worked in the past.
Part IV Meat
I use to hate the fact that my family basically consists of a bunch of carnivores. However, my roommates eat primarily vegetables and fish, which means in Lawrence I ate primarily vegetables. It is nice to come home and have the three meals I will eat at my mom's house consist of ham and bean soup, pepperoni pizza and steak.
Part V Location
I wish Lansing was closer to everything. I was planning on getting father's day stuff for the step dad yesterday but then the whole violently ill thing happened so now I have to drive 20 minutes to the "close target."
Part VI Sleeping
I came home so tired, sore, sick and hungry that my mom made me sleep all day, shower and eat. Then at night time she gave me something to help me sleep. She says it was a sleeping pill, I think it was mixed with LSD. The last thing I remember is opening a diet coke to take the pill and then remembering I had to do laundry. Walking to the laundry machine made me feel like I was incredibly drunk. This is the last thing I remember. I woke up in a position of obviously protecting myself, the diet coke was completely empty and I had called Nicholas and sent Joel texts.
- Sub Part VI Two Friends: Nicholas is my very amazing roommate for next year. Joel is my best friend. I am convinced Joel and I are on a extremely deep level because every once in a while he will say (or I will say) something completely off topic and it will be the very next thing the I was going to (or he was going to) say. Also because we tend to call each other when the other needs it. Now, this was less believable when we lived together because we were always around. However, we have both made it a point to get out more and spend more time with other friends now that we live apart. So, the fact that Joel has called me twice in the past 5 days and both times he was the exact person I wanted to hear from and needed to talk to makes me realize how incredibly important he is in my life.
So, I don't know what I talked to Nicholas about. However the text conversation I had with Joel was as follows.
D: "I love how my mom's answer to being sick and tired is giving me one extra strength sleeping pill."
D: "O man thr world is melting around mr ans everxthink is goigng much slower thab norman."
J: "Are you ok?"
D: "These pills are like slowing down everything around me and ita,s all melting i.to ny cave"
J: "Let your mom know."
D: "Know x.au?"
D: "Yuk should come i'm my cave. The muppets are mad e of veggies and tqlk along tkm deval wears prad.a its awesome"
J: "That the pills are really affecting you."
D: "You should come hang out in this cool cave; but if you come yours legs get numb jusr warning"
J: "Haha sounds fun"
D: "..quat to trun off mi telefornn so I don't vect the cave."
So, apparently I had some epic battle last night inside a cave with some vegetable Muppets. I'm guessing I lost because I woke up with my hands and arms covering my face and the top of my head.
Part VI.1 My Brother and the Bike
My mom and Jeff bought my brother a brand new bigger bicycle a couple of days ago. It is green and black and overall the epitome of this bike is manly and made for a kid that beats guys up, chews tobacco and is going to be a professional wrestler. It says I'm mean and tough and probably going to ride through a big pile of mud and then ride their your house, sucker! Well all of it accept for one part. Suzie Q. Yes, that is right. Awhile ago I was teaching my brother how to ride his older (too small for him, hence the new one) bike. He was struggling with it and I thought it was just that his legs were too big (which eventually was the problem because he races down the street on this new bike, I swear the kid has no fear) but I decided maybe he was scared of trying something new. He also refused to put his bike back in the garage when he was done with it. So, I thought it would be a good idea to have him name his bike. I figured it would make it less scary to him and more important to him, so he named the last bike "tricycle" not the most creative name but it will do. So, Suzie Q--I've suspected my brother to be gay for awhile now. Part of me thinks oh he is 2 or 3 or 4 and just boys at that age are kind of flamboyant. However, I have never heard a 4 year old boy name something Suzie Q. I want my brother to be happy in life and I am going to completely support whatever path is meant for him. I am worried that because he lives in Lansing Kansas and has two homophobic parents (my mom is one of those, gays are okay but not in my back yard and Jeff is one of those the bible says being gay is wrong, I think it is wrong, it is wrong types of folks. However, he would never be impolite to a gay person to their face. ) that if he is in fact gay it will be pretty hard for him growing up. I can't help but think maybe God has give me a best friend who happens to be gay as a resource for the years to come with my brother. I know out of everyone in my family I am the most accepting and probably going to be an extremely important person for my brother growing up, if he is in fact gay. Part of me feels that I need to stay in Kansas to help him but then part of me knows I need to leave Kansas to help myself.
Part VI.2 My brother and the Tie
My family and Jeff went to church this morning. It is a relaxed church where wearing jeans is perfectly acceptable. So, my brother walked around the house this morning talking about how he really wanted to wear a tie to church, his tie with cars on it. My step-dad said that since he wasn't wearing a shirt with a collar on it, he couldn't wear the tie. Jeff obviously hasn't been to a concert in Lawrence lately, no collar but ties on is totally in right now! My brother's tie has a zipper on it, so basically you zip the tie up to your neck. It is sweet, genius and something most adults should own for themselves. I say, the kid is four--this is the time when he can wear something that would seem ridiculous but since he is 4 it doesn't matter, he is just expressing his creativity!
Part VII Prairie Home Companion and Bluegrass
I love bluegrass, especially when I just happen to catch an episode of Prairie Home Companion where Sara Watkins of Nickel Creek is on.
Part VIII Divorce
While I do miss having my original family together, for the most part I am happy they got a divorce. Yes, I think they could have worked it out and stayed married--but I know from personal experience the feeling of being cheated on is horrible and you really can't ever 100% forgive and trust the person. It becomes a fact in your relationship and will always be there. Yes you can get past it, but it will always be there. The only time the divorce really sucks is Holidays, Anniversaries and Birthdays. Like father's day. Now, I'm not a fan of my step-dad, he is not a horrible guy but I would rather do without him in my life--so for me celebrating father's day with him isn't important. My day is the most pro-active deadbeat dad ever. Meaning, he is a step and a half away from being a dead beat dad but does just enough to slid under the radar of dead beat dad. I'd rather spend father's day with him because I wouldn't exist without him but spending father's day with Jeff is very important to my mom. So, here I am feeling guilty and spending time I could being studying for tomorrow with the two families.
but then all is fair... all is fair.
danielle
Part I Catching Up
I haven't been feeling decent emotionally or mentally lately. On Friday night into Saturday morning I worked from 11 pm to 9 am. At about 5 am I got violently ill but stuck it out for the rest of the shift. I went up and went to bed and woke up around 2:30--still violently ill.
Part II Driving
I ended up making a horrible decision to drive to my mom's house because in my head I thought I'll be better off there. The drive home takes about 35 to 40 minutes and I fell asleep twice. I also took my exit going 80, not realizing what I was doing till I had to slam on the brakes to prevent flying off the edge. Slamming on my brakes caused my car to almost flip and roll. It would have instantly killed me because my windows were open and I wasn't wearing a seat belt. This is the third time this has happened to me. The first time I was in my red KIA and exited for Lawrence and there was ice on the road and I should have slid off but slammed on my breaks and surprisingly didn't. The second time I was with Allison, and this is the only time I feel horrible about it. I mean if I kill myself because of my driving, I'm okay with that but if I kill one of my friends would only hope I would end up dead as well because there is no way I could tell someone's parents "I was driving and stupidly sped and didn't pay attention. Sorry I killed your daughter my best friend." Anywho, the second time I was driving around back roads in North Shawnee, near Lake Quivera. In high school I knew these roads like the back of my hand and I knew when I could speed, when the 90 degree turn was and where the dead ends were. I ended up going from 65 to 0 in a matter of 4 seconds and really honestly I have no explanation for how we didn't slam face first into grassy hill where the road made a T.
Part III Shutting Out
I've been completely shutting out various people in my life right now, simply because it is what I need to do. It is what I do when I don't know what else to do or how else to solve the problem, and it is what has worked in the past.
Part IV Meat
I use to hate the fact that my family basically consists of a bunch of carnivores. However, my roommates eat primarily vegetables and fish, which means in Lawrence I ate primarily vegetables. It is nice to come home and have the three meals I will eat at my mom's house consist of ham and bean soup, pepperoni pizza and steak.
Part V Location
I wish Lansing was closer to everything. I was planning on getting father's day stuff for the step dad yesterday but then the whole violently ill thing happened so now I have to drive 20 minutes to the "close target."
Part VI Sleeping
I came home so tired, sore, sick and hungry that my mom made me sleep all day, shower and eat. Then at night time she gave me something to help me sleep. She says it was a sleeping pill, I think it was mixed with LSD. The last thing I remember is opening a diet coke to take the pill and then remembering I had to do laundry. Walking to the laundry machine made me feel like I was incredibly drunk. This is the last thing I remember. I woke up in a position of obviously protecting myself, the diet coke was completely empty and I had called Nicholas and sent Joel texts.
- Sub Part VI Two Friends: Nicholas is my very amazing roommate for next year. Joel is my best friend. I am convinced Joel and I are on a extremely deep level because every once in a while he will say (or I will say) something completely off topic and it will be the very next thing the I was going to (or he was going to) say. Also because we tend to call each other when the other needs it. Now, this was less believable when we lived together because we were always around. However, we have both made it a point to get out more and spend more time with other friends now that we live apart. So, the fact that Joel has called me twice in the past 5 days and both times he was the exact person I wanted to hear from and needed to talk to makes me realize how incredibly important he is in my life.
So, I don't know what I talked to Nicholas about. However the text conversation I had with Joel was as follows.
D: "I love how my mom's answer to being sick and tired is giving me one extra strength sleeping pill."
D: "O man thr world is melting around mr ans everxthink is goigng much slower thab norman."
J: "Are you ok?"
D: "These pills are like slowing down everything around me and ita,s all melting i.to ny cave"
J: "Let your mom know."
D: "Know x.au?"
D: "Yuk should come i'm my cave. The muppets are mad e of veggies and tqlk along tkm deval wears prad.a its awesome"
J: "That the pills are really affecting you."
D: "You should come hang out in this cool cave; but if you come yours legs get numb jusr warning"
J: "Haha sounds fun"
D: "..quat to trun off mi telefornn so I don't vect the cave."
So, apparently I had some epic battle last night inside a cave with some vegetable Muppets. I'm guessing I lost because I woke up with my hands and arms covering my face and the top of my head.
Part VI.1 My Brother and the Bike
My mom and Jeff bought my brother a brand new bigger bicycle a couple of days ago. It is green and black and overall the epitome of this bike is manly and made for a kid that beats guys up, chews tobacco and is going to be a professional wrestler. It says I'm mean and tough and probably going to ride through a big pile of mud and then ride their your house, sucker! Well all of it accept for one part. Suzie Q. Yes, that is right. Awhile ago I was teaching my brother how to ride his older (too small for him, hence the new one) bike. He was struggling with it and I thought it was just that his legs were too big (which eventually was the problem because he races down the street on this new bike, I swear the kid has no fear) but I decided maybe he was scared of trying something new. He also refused to put his bike back in the garage when he was done with it. So, I thought it would be a good idea to have him name his bike. I figured it would make it less scary to him and more important to him, so he named the last bike "tricycle" not the most creative name but it will do. So, Suzie Q--I've suspected my brother to be gay for awhile now. Part of me thinks oh he is 2 or 3 or 4 and just boys at that age are kind of flamboyant. However, I have never heard a 4 year old boy name something Suzie Q. I want my brother to be happy in life and I am going to completely support whatever path is meant for him. I am worried that because he lives in Lansing Kansas and has two homophobic parents (my mom is one of those, gays are okay but not in my back yard and Jeff is one of those the bible says being gay is wrong, I think it is wrong, it is wrong types of folks. However, he would never be impolite to a gay person to their face. ) that if he is in fact gay it will be pretty hard for him growing up. I can't help but think maybe God has give me a best friend who happens to be gay as a resource for the years to come with my brother. I know out of everyone in my family I am the most accepting and probably going to be an extremely important person for my brother growing up, if he is in fact gay. Part of me feels that I need to stay in Kansas to help him but then part of me knows I need to leave Kansas to help myself.
Part VI.2 My brother and the Tie
My family and Jeff went to church this morning. It is a relaxed church where wearing jeans is perfectly acceptable. So, my brother walked around the house this morning talking about how he really wanted to wear a tie to church, his tie with cars on it. My step-dad said that since he wasn't wearing a shirt with a collar on it, he couldn't wear the tie. Jeff obviously hasn't been to a concert in Lawrence lately, no collar but ties on is totally in right now! My brother's tie has a zipper on it, so basically you zip the tie up to your neck. It is sweet, genius and something most adults should own for themselves. I say, the kid is four--this is the time when he can wear something that would seem ridiculous but since he is 4 it doesn't matter, he is just expressing his creativity!
Part VII Prairie Home Companion and Bluegrass
I love bluegrass, especially when I just happen to catch an episode of Prairie Home Companion where Sara Watkins of Nickel Creek is on.
Part VIII Divorce
While I do miss having my original family together, for the most part I am happy they got a divorce. Yes, I think they could have worked it out and stayed married--but I know from personal experience the feeling of being cheated on is horrible and you really can't ever 100% forgive and trust the person. It becomes a fact in your relationship and will always be there. Yes you can get past it, but it will always be there. The only time the divorce really sucks is Holidays, Anniversaries and Birthdays. Like father's day. Now, I'm not a fan of my step-dad, he is not a horrible guy but I would rather do without him in my life--so for me celebrating father's day with him isn't important. My day is the most pro-active deadbeat dad ever. Meaning, he is a step and a half away from being a dead beat dad but does just enough to slid under the radar of dead beat dad. I'd rather spend father's day with him because I wouldn't exist without him but spending father's day with Jeff is very important to my mom. So, here I am feeling guilty and spending time I could being studying for tomorrow with the two families.
but then all is fair... all is fair.
danielle
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Growing Up.
I'm scared shitless. I just registered for the GRE on August 20th. Which basically means, if I fuck it up--that's all. I feel as if our generation is just expected to know how to do everything. I mean we do have the series of tubes we call the interweb which can pretty much teach us anything but I have no clue where to start on applying to grad schools. The only thing I know is--I want to leave Kansas and I want to study the physical world in some aspect. I want to go to a school that is good and has good people. I want to go to a place where I am going to get much more out of it than just an education, yet I really want a good education. I really should stop writing this and focus on ethics.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
